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Living Up to Myself

Living Up to Myself
Writer, 12

Have you ever wanted to be that girl who always gets an "A" on all of the math tests and makes the basketball team? The girl who seems to be able to do anything she tries? At first it sounds extremely good, I know. But...I am one of those girls and let me tell you that it's not at all what you expect it to be.

I do very well in school and on tests. Tests are easier for me than they are for most people. You see, I don't even need to study to get an "A" on an English test. I know, most people think, "What's so bad about that? It sounds like a super deal to me!" But it really isn't like that. Why? Well, when I get an "A" on a test, I never feel good about it. Why not? Maybe if I studied really hard the night before and I usually didn't ace tests, I would feel proud of myself for getting the grade. But since I almost always get an easy "A," I can never feel good about my test scores. I usually feel bad because if I didn't study at all before the test and got an "A," and someone else did study really hard for it, but got a "B," or a "C," that's not fair because they tried harder than I did, but I got a better score. Also, everyone calls you to help them with homework because they think you'll always know the answers, and after a while, you feel kind of used.

I am also very athletic and will be trying out for the sport team that I made last year. For most people, if they don't make the team it's not a big deal. But for me, if I don't make it my parents will wonder what went wrong. If I don't get an "A" on one test, my parents wonder what went wrong. You see, I have to live up to myself. I've done so well and I have to keep it up. Right now I'm on top, but once you get up there, there's nowhere to go but down.

Last night, for the first time in a while, I was practicing basketball in my backyard. I realized how special I was to have all my abilities, and how God created me and loves me the way I am and that I should too. I realized that even though I am gifted in many areas, and though there may be down sides to that, I will and should always try to be good enough for myself.

I am the way I am for a reason, so I might as well enjoy it! I guess I just wanted to let every girl know that no matter whether it seems like you're good at everything, not so good at everything, thin, heavy, smart, slower, tall, short, or anything in between, you are really cool, so appreciate yourself! You're how you are for a reason, so use it! Feel good about yourself even when it seems like it's the hardest thing in the world to do. That's what I learned, and it's very valuable advice. Believe me.

Last Modified Date: 1/10/2001